Communication Toolkit for Introverts: Preview Chapter – Communication Preferences of Introverts and Extroverts

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communication-toolkit-for-introverts-coverCommunication Toolkit for Introverts: Preview Chapter – Communication Preferences of Introverts and Extroverts


Communication Preferences of Introverts and Extroverts


“Life is not about pretending to be someone else, or trying to be like someone else. It’s about being who you are regardless if it makes you different.” – Nishan Panwar, writer


Image courtesy of KROMKRATHOG at

A husband and wife each took on the role of a C-level position in their newly started small business. He, Bob, was a more contemplative and conscientious style communicator and she, Barbara, was more talkative and lively.

The newly appointed Sales and Marketing Manager, Sandra, would always plan differently for meetings with each of them.

For Bob, Sandra did her homework, often supporting facts or statistics with a chart or graph. She purposely spoke more slowly and sought for agreement at every step. They each would often make notes of something they wanted to revisit for further discussion. In particular, this approach was important when Sandra was asking for a salary increase.

For Barbara, Sandra would plan for twice the amount of time for a meeting than was scheduled. Quite often, by the time the conversation turned to the original purpose of the meeting, Sandra would have to jokingly state the main agenda item when Barbara laughingly said “But we are way off track now!”

Fortunately, Sandra used her understanding of personality styles from early in her sales career when she was communicating with almost everyone. After all, as human beings we tend to enjoy more successful communications when communicating with people who are more like us. Sandra intended to master her communication with these influential people at that early stage in her career. After all, these two people would determine at least her salary and her position in the small company of 75 people.

In this story, I am Sandra. It’s important you know this, so you understand the ideas, tips, and strategies I share with you come from my life learning experiences.

Additionally, when I choose to introduce someone else’s stories to you, it’s because I know they too have successfully managed everyday business situations you want to know about as an introvert in a business environment.

Knowing about the communication preferences between the introvert and extrovert will help you better navigate your daily communications.

We’ll cover the following topics in this chapter:

– You will understand how the introvert and extrovert may be both different and the same in their communications.

– You may surprise yourself finding out that different styles can work together productively.

– If you currently think you have to change to be more extroverted to succeed, that will no longer be your thinking.

– To give you practical ideas that you or your manager can do to make your environment more conducive to both the introvert and extrovert preferences.

What does introvert, extrovert, and ambivert mean?

Carl Jung, a Swiss psychiatrist, and psychotherapy is noted for his work regarding two major personality traits. Jung theorized and then decades later after studying his work, Katharine Briggs and Isabel Myers created the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator® (MBTI) questionnaire.

After a person answers the questions, their preference of four personality continuums are determined. The assessment gives a person a broad and full awareness of their preferences.

The four preferences of the MBTI® are:

> Introversion and Extroversion: A person gets their energy either from themselves or from outside themselves

> Intuitive and Sensing: We process information either based on patterns of information or sensory details in the present

> Thinking and Feeling: We make decisions either in a logical, detached, objective manner or our bias is toward an attached manner with values we hold

> Judging and Perceiving: A person takes action either from a planned or a more spontaneous approach

The first preference, the introversion and extroversion continuum, reflects what the answers reveal regarding what energizes the assessment taker.

No one is solely more introverted or extroverted.

Someone more extroverted is more interested in attention toward the outer world, to include talking and interacting with others. Someone more introverted prefers the inner world of quiet reflection and ideas, thoughts, and imagination.

Even though each person moves up and down the continuum all day long and in various situations, we each tend to have a preference, one where we are most energized with the activities of the day.

Most current conversations in the research community suggest that more of us are ambiverts. This means our personality has a balance of introvert and extrovert preferences. For example, we can enjoy networking but recognize that how we prepare for it might need to be with some quieter activities before such events. Or, we can enjoy, even thrive, as a public speaker, but need to recharge after giving a presentation.


Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at

Coming up next for you, including an easy to follow chart and tips list:

What are the differences between introvert and extrovert communication?

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  1. I always found the Briggs and Myers test/formula fascinating. I don’t remember what I came out as when I went through the questionnaire but it was a surprise to me and everyone else 🙂
    Tim recently posted…A Travelers Worst NightmareMy Profile

  2. I like the comment about not being totally introverted or extroverted. I am an introvert, totally, but I have been able to channel that inner extrovert when I need him.

  3. If you haven’t yet read Communication Toolkit for Introverts you should It’s a great read even for us that are extrovert. I highly recommend Patricia’s astute and intelligent book.
    Catarina recently posted…Do you find time for strategic thinking?My Profile

  4. Congrats on getting your book out Patricia. I’m sure once people get those first couple chapters, they’ll be chomping at the bit for the rest! 🙂

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