Are you observing that people still have misconceptions about introverts? Are you possibly being influenced by these same misconceptions that continue to have you “wish” you weren’t an introvert? In the Bible one of the old testament books reminds me of the introvert plight.
Daniel, being taken captive in Babylon, was feeling hopeless and shaken. The king Nebuchadnezzar, was making demands on the new subjects that Daniel couldn’t go along with. While he did agree to take on a new name, he drew the line at eating the king’s food and bowing down to graven images. Daniel knew his boundaries.
As an introvert you can draw boundaries and decide to make things clear about what being an introvert is and is not.
First, are we going to let ourselves be fooled into thinking that we aren’t good enough as we are? Daniel was faithful to who he was and what he believed. “Introverts often: have quiet energy; listen more than talk; think quietly inside my head; think, then act; feel comfortable being alone; prefer to work “behind-the-scenes”; have good powers of concentration; prefer to focus on one thing at a time; are self-contained and reserved.” Can you think of when these traits are more helpful than their opposites? If you think you can assess yourself with 4 questions, you can find this complete description under introvert. If you need more questions, try my 15 questions! If you want to get more in-depth, to assess all four of the MBTI.
Second, we have some traits that could be helpful if everyone had! Like Daniel refusing to drink the royal food and drink, as introverts we tend to let others speak before we speak more than extroverts. I’m not certain that it’s politeness, although it is a helpful trait! Allowing others to speak without interrupting furthers understanding in a conversation. Would it be helpful if everyone was like this?
Third, there are certain skills that are smart to learn. Daniel decided, “Okay, call me what you want to,” being in that new culture. Being employed – an employee, a business owner, a manager, a self-employed person – puts us in a culture where extroverting skills like networking, making presentations, contributing in meetings are all necessary – therefore, smart to learn and fortunately, we can learn them.
You are more than a label. It’s said we’re just 25% of the population – not true; we are a strong 49%. It’s said we aren’t social – not true – we just prefer more than idle chit chat. People call us party poopers – again not true, we just need to replenish our energy being around people. Daniel knew his boundaries; and introverts too can draw the line by knowing that our more reflective nature brings positive to relationships, business and life.
What other untruths are there that you find being said behind something that is really the truth? I’m interested in knowing!
Thanks for the very thoughtful post! I love the ties and references to Daniel and his experiences. As an introvert myself, I needed this message today.
Many times we focus on the skills and talents we don’t have rather than not only appreciating but leveraging the talents and gifts we do have. Shifting our thinking around this can truly make a real difference in how we approach clients, prospects, and contacts.
Keep up the great work!
Diana
Boundaries: “To vacillate or not to vacillate – that is the question…or is it?”
We all need boundaries and a discussion of specific ones that apply to introverts is very useful.
Pat has some good tips in this post and I would only add that as you are considering boundaries and were to put them use history, custom and consistency to help you choose wisely and…. a
“Always color within the lines, but consider moving the lines first.”~unknown