Whether you’re an introvert or extrovert, a new or seasoned business owner, you’re bound to experience moments of self-doubt when networking online or in person. What IS the source of this self-doubt? Well, it exists because of limiting beliefs we continue to hold onto about our selves, others, and our surroundings. Self-doubt also shows up in your hands through your fingerprints. Recently a new Joint Venture partner complimented me saying she noted I am consistently self-confident: the opposite of doubtful? She then proceeded with her “white glove-elephant test” as a challenge. Do you get distracted by these two common white elephants, limiting beliefs, in the networking room?
Her Question #1: Aren’t most people networking looking for prospective clients, instead of looking to buy something or a service from you?
My Answer #1: “I don’t ride that elephant! Everyone is networking for something: a job, clients, partners, resources. Most people are “looking” but not necessarily at all times for the same thing. At any one time, there could be that “perfect storm”… when all the planets are aligned… when someone is looking for the very thing that you offer. This is why it is so important to have more empowering and better beliefs than people carry with them! How much better would you feel while networking if you looked at how you could help someone instead of looking at how they could help you? It frees you up of that kind of pushy used car salesman mentality. Give yourself a new assignment at the your networking event: Discover what it does for you and the person you’re conversing with to make that mental shift.”
Her Question #2: Aren’t most people too impatient or self-absorbed to even get to the point of eventually helping one another — when the timing, situation and resource is the “right fit”?’
My Answer #2: “Self-absorbed? Almost everyone is. But here’s the rub – if you are more ‘other” focused and patient, things will actually move faster. Think about meeting two people at any networking event – in-person or online – let’s say Jack and Jill, just for the purpose of comparison. Jack introduces himself and starts talking, more like babbling, about himself, his company, his products, his services, the longevity of his company, and the uniqueness of his offer. Then you meet Jill. Jill introduces herself and starts talking with you: She wants to know about you, asks about what you are networking for, even offers you a lead for something you need, and wants to know about your company. I wonder, who will you want to get to know further through a follow up? I’m betting it’s Jill. In order to get what you want for yourself, you want to be more ‘other’ focused at first. Consider changing the conversation on that first meeting – being more ‘other’ focused. Then build from there.
And remember, things that open up may not be a direct shot from the people you meet. However, with an ‘other’ focus and patience, it improves the timing of that special someone for you to help, to actually show up.” Stop riding these elephants!
This is just tip of the networking iceberg.
If you are serious about bringing in more business through networking and/or have a desire to become a more masterful business networker, listen in on a free teleclass by Monique MacKinnon and Pat Weber at “Powerful networking for straight shooters who mean and want more business!” Register now and avoid the elephant stampede!